Now we’ve talked about massive swords, combat worthy swords, transformer swords, even ghost busting swords. Now we get to talk about the longest freakin’ sword in the history of swords. at least in the history of fictitious swords. Until they began manufacturing them. At which point they became real swords. Based on a fictitious sword, from the (you guessed it!) Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children movie. which means that it doesn’t count. Which doesn’t matter because it’s still not “Da longenesest sword evah.” Confused yet? Good. Cause I’m messin’ wit you.
To my knowledge, the longest real sword ever made, at almost 76in overall, is the Japanese Ôdachi called the Kashiwa Tachi. AKA The Yamagane Tsukuri Kokushitsu Hirumaki Ôdachi. AKA “Da Longenest Japanese Sword in da Werlds. Evar.” Ok so it’s really not called that. But it should be:
Yep. Now that’s a sword. And, fittingly, it’s name is equally long. What is it with the long names for long swords? I don’t get it. Anyway, a sword like this would probably be useless for anything but ceremony or decorating a wall, but there it is.
But that isn’t why we are here today. Were here to see a fictitious sword brought to life. Even though with real swords like the Kashiwa Tachi Ôdachi in existence, it’s almost a let down. Almost.
Welcome to the almost interminable expanse of steel that is
Now this sword is not as large as the Kashiwa Tachi, but at 68in long, with a 50in blade, it’s no slouch either. This will definitely reach out and touch someone. And not in a nice way either.
You could probably cut down a small tree with this. With a single cut. If you could actually wield it. Not likely for mere mortals such as you and I…
I sometimes forget. I’m not really mere mortal now am I. Sheesh. I’ve been hanging out with you folks waaay too long…