Posts Tagged ‘Wire’

A Sleek (Non)Arthurian Sword…

Monday, December 14th, 2009

So, once again, I find myself confronted by a sword which, while absolutely beautiful, also appears to have aesthetics that run counter to it’s supposed origins. I present to you, the magical sword of King Arthur of the Knights of the Round Table, Excalibur:

King Arthur of the Round Table Excalibur Sword

King Arthur of the Round Table Excalibur Sword

Ooookaaayyy… So does anyone else notice something fishy here? And I’m not referring to the smell the sword must have picked up from being stored in a lake, by the Lady of the Lake, for so many centuries. No, I am referring to the fact that this sword does not appear to match the aesthetics we would expect to see from a sword made in the era of the Crusades.

The swords of the Crusaders were generally more… Cross shaped. They tended to have straight cross guards, which made their swords look like crosses, a physical symbol, a reminder, if you will, for the knightly Crusaders, that they were the Swords of God. Yeah. Uh huh.

Anyway, These swords also carried a round medallion pommel, and tended to sport much a more wedge shaped blade, with the blade narrowing significantly from hilt to tip. The grips were also much more likely to be mildly tapered, with  a leather wrap.

Now the sword above. This wretched pretender, does not match any of those traits.

This sword has, instead of a medallion, a stubby cross pommel. Yes, it does have a cross emblazoned on the center on said cross, but still. And then the grip… Wire wrapped. No leather. Which brings us to the guard. Which starts off straight, but then curves up towards the point with an almost dragon scale like motif. Definitely not the kind of thing a Knight of the Cross should carry!! And that blade… Long, straight and narrow… No wedge.

So. I can guess what your thinking at this juncture. And it probably sounds a little like “Pardon my French, but… YOU, GOOD STEEL MADAME, are an IMPOSTER!! You HEATHENOUS WRETCH!!! How DARE you claim to be EXCALIBUR!!!  >: (  ”

OK, ok, easy now. Let’s not be hasty. She’s a fine lass, and, truth be told, I like her. The slim lithe blade, the mild curve and pattern on the guard, it’s down to earth overall simplicity…  Let me play devils advocate for a bit.  >: }

First of all, Excalibur was not forged of man… but of ancient magic. So it does not have to look exactly like every other sword. In fact, it was a magic sword, so it should most likely *not* look like any other sword, so we really should not judge it just because it looks different.

And then of course there is the somewhat minor detail that stories of King Arthur seem to appear a few hundred years before the Crusades start, so the whole cross sword motif may not have started back then. Of course that would also invalidate the whole King Arthur legend as we currently know it, so I’m going to pretend that inconsistency does not exist. 🙂

Truth is, regardless of her heritage, she’s a beautiful sword. Who cares if she doesn’t look like all the other girls. She’s sharp, she’s got a great personality, she sweet, she’s smart, honest, and upfront, likes to get to the point and says what’s on her mind, ie, I don’t have to guess what she really means when she’s got her edge to my throat, has a great sense of humor, and, most importantly, she’s magical! None of the others can say that. So I don’t care. If you don’t like it, you can just sod off…  She’s mine. :p

Wait… What? Did I…? What just happened?

Doggone magical swords…

King Arthurs Excalibur Sword – [Saber and Sword]

Taking Multi-tools too far…

Friday, November 20th, 2009

So I like multitools as much as anyone else, but I think there is a common sense limit to what they should be able to do. I have a SAK (Swiss Army Knife)  that I bought oh, about 15 or so odd years ago, and in spite of being one of my regular use EDCs for the vast majority of that time, it works today pretty much like it did the day I bought it. I’ve misplaced the pen from the SAK, and signal mirror that used to be stored in the leather case, but besides that, it’s a gem.

Now my SAK has about 17 or 18 different tools on it, not counting what’s in the sheath that it came with, and I have used each and every tool on that thing at one point or another so I can’t really complain about it having too many, however I’ve always wondered if there was such a thing as too much… Like too many tools… or maybe a tool that just makes no sense.

Wenger Giant Swiss Army Knife

Wenger Giant Swiss Army Knife

Well, I’ve seen the humongous, gazillion tool Swiss Army Knife, so that first question has been answered. 🙂

However the answer to the second question came in the form of a rather unique multitool I found a while back… I’ll let you judge for yourself:

Utility Knife & Tool

Utility Knife & Tool

Now this is certainly an interesting multitool. In addition to having very few tools, at least compared to most other multitools out there, it has a rather… eclectic… selection of tools. By my count I see 6 tools. Which, in an of itself, isn’t bad, if all you need are 6 tools, I’m a fan of economy of tools, and getting only what you need, but, in this case… well, lets go through the list.

First, the staples of any multitool, we have a simple knife. Good to go. Then moving on, we have a can opener. No complaints. Then a set of heavy wire cutters. Cool. The wire cutters are part of a set of pliers. Can’t go wrong there. And what looks like maybe a spring for the handle of the pliers. I dunno. BUT, Then we have, integrated with the head of the pliers… A claw hammer.

Yeah… A claw hammer. Really? A CLAW HAMMER? on a MULTITOOL?!? Now don’t get me wrong, I think the claw part is actually a good idea. You could use that to pull nails, open crates, etc. But the hammer head… This thing would have to be built like a tank in order to handle use as a hammer.

Now I must cede that there may actually be people out there that would find something like this incredibly useful. But even so, that whole claw hammer thing just really kills the portability of this tool. Yes, it comes with a sheath, which I’m guessing would b rather large. And I don’t know how much it weighs, but it would probably feel like a brick hanging from your belt.

And even if it didn’t wouldn’t the hammer just be a pain to use being attached to the swiveling part of the pliers? Keep swinging open on you and stuff? I’m all about innovation and invention, but this thing… I don’t know.

I really don’t know…

Utility Knife and Tool – [True Swords]

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