Ok, so I ran into this little shyster of a weapon yesterday, and thought it would make for an interesting post. It is yet another movie themed sword. The Movie? Pirates of the Caribbean! Aaaaarrr! The weapon? None other than the sword of Jack Sparrow, pirate extraordinaire:

Jack Sparrows Sword…

Yaaaarrrggghhh!

Jack Sparrows Pirate Sword
[view full size]

Aaarrrrrr…! OK, ok, ok I’ll stop with the yaaaaarrgghhs… LOL.

Now this is a pirates sword! Yes? … Actually, no. No it’s not.

Not that I like poking holes in Hollywood fallacies, but… Wait… no… Actually, to be honest, I love poking holes in Hollywood fictions… 🙂 But my point is, this is not the kind of weapon your average pirate might use. This sword is too long, too light and not sufficiently curved.

Yeah. Now I’ll bet you are wondering why a good pirates sword would need to meet the above three criteria. Well, being the snooty know-it-all that I am, I’m gonna tell you. In fact you can’t stop me! Yaaarr… eerrr… ahem… *crickets chirping*…

Whatever…

What I was gonna say is this: It’s simply a matter of space. Or the lack thereof. Aboard a ship, one of your major restraints would be a lack of “elbow room” as it were. In a battle, obviously, with a deck overflowing with bloodthirsty pirates, that deficiency would be compounded.

So your ideal sword would be one that could be swung in small spaces, with an equally localized cutting arc, but with a blade that also had some weight, so that you didn’t need so much space to generate lethal cuts. The weight of the sword could do some of the work for you…

In other words the ideal pirate sword would be… a short, heavy scimitar. Now we can see why pirates relied so heavily on the use of short, curved, broad/heavy cutlasses, and later on, cut down sabers… Neither of which categories the above sword falls into. In other words, the weapon above would be an epic fail in such a battlefield.

Now don’t get me wrong, this is a sweet sword. The dark, long, mildly upward sweeping blade would make for a reasonably good slashing weapon, and that wicked little point would allow thrusting attacks like a hot knife through warm butter… But it just ain’t a pirate sword, Jack… :p

Jack Sparrows Sword – [Realm Collections]